Growin Up Jerrahco Style
Anyone who knows me, knows that I am not a suspicious or paranoid person. I love life and everything about it.
until recently, I never had any reason to be scared of much of anything. My life was at best semi-dramatic. i had
normal teenage issues...I'm too fat, my boobs won't grow, I like him he doesn't know I exist, normal stuff. I wasnot
unique or any different than any other 17 year old highschool senior. Yes, I'd been through alot and was very
mature, but not really different. I was still just a carefree and nieve teen. The thought never occured to me to lock the
doors at night, or look over my shoulder, or that someone could dislike me enough to want me dead. Well, all that
changed pretty quick. And in two minthes time I've done more growing up and maturing than I ever thought
possible. See, I always thought that growing up meant you lost your spark. I thought you lost your love for life and
your sense of wonder and curiosity. I thought it meant that you face reality and see that the world is a cold cruel
place and you're just another face in the crowd. I was wrong. growing up means you see the world for what it is,
with all it's injustice, pain, terror, and evil. You see other people for who they are. You see that dreams may very well
never become reality. You see that life is pain but life is always joy. You see that one moment of joy can make up for
years of hurt. You see that as long as you have hope and the will to go on, change things, and make a good life, that
you can. You see that you can get those things you dreamed of. You can grab that start that seemed out of reach as a
child. For me, it was all those things and more, and I didn't realize what was happening. I didn't know why I
suddenly had hope and faith, where before there were doubt and despair. I didn't know until I had reason to feel
alive, reason to open up...that there is a life after tradgedy, and that you will remember the bad forever, but it does not
make you who you are. A person's worth is determined not by what happened to them, but by what they did to get
through it. Hope, no matter how foolish, will always bring you back to a path of joy and safety. That is what growing
up is to me.
until recently, I never had any reason to be scared of much of anything. My life was at best semi-dramatic. i had
normal teenage issues...I'm too fat, my boobs won't grow, I like him he doesn't know I exist, normal stuff. I wasnot
unique or any different than any other 17 year old highschool senior. Yes, I'd been through alot and was very
mature, but not really different. I was still just a carefree and nieve teen. The thought never occured to me to lock the
doors at night, or look over my shoulder, or that someone could dislike me enough to want me dead. Well, all that
changed pretty quick. And in two minthes time I've done more growing up and maturing than I ever thought
possible. See, I always thought that growing up meant you lost your spark. I thought you lost your love for life and
your sense of wonder and curiosity. I thought it meant that you face reality and see that the world is a cold cruel
place and you're just another face in the crowd. I was wrong. growing up means you see the world for what it is,
with all it's injustice, pain, terror, and evil. You see other people for who they are. You see that dreams may very well
never become reality. You see that life is pain but life is always joy. You see that one moment of joy can make up for
years of hurt. You see that as long as you have hope and the will to go on, change things, and make a good life, that
you can. You see that you can get those things you dreamed of. You can grab that start that seemed out of reach as a
child. For me, it was all those things and more, and I didn't realize what was happening. I didn't know why I
suddenly had hope and faith, where before there were doubt and despair. I didn't know until I had reason to feel
alive, reason to open up...that there is a life after tradgedy, and that you will remember the bad forever, but it does not
make you who you are. A person's worth is determined not by what happened to them, but by what they did to get
through it. Hope, no matter how foolish, will always bring you back to a path of joy and safety. That is what growing
up is to me.
posted by Bear at 12:51 AM
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